February 15, 2007

Stay Open

When I first came to Campbell, I was very curious, appreciative and open. I was experiencing all new things, both environmentally and socially. For the first few weeks, I remember, there were very few cliques to be intimidated by or excluded from. There were just new faces and new friendships to find. I wasn't scared of anyone and I didn't talk bad about anyone. Everyone was just too cool.

Once the second or third week came, however, things started to change. People started to sit with the same groups, tables start to have regular inhabitants, and exclusivity started becoming normal. Everyone had one or more groups to which they "belonged" and, consequently, several dozen groups to which they did not. It was a comfortable place for those within the groups, but outside them it wasn't that friendly. I remember, I started becoming comfortable but unfortunately I became pretty unfriendly too.

My personal challenge, for a long time, has been trying to get back those first few weeks of school. I want to find that openness, curiousity and appreciation and stay in it again. It can be scary to sit with new people, hard to realize that new friends might be right around the corner, and fun to always sit with the same group, but imagine what would happen if we didn't every once and a while. We all remember sitting by ourselves, we all remember being new to the group, can we remember what it was like to be innocent and kind again? My guess is that it's a much more enjoyable place to be and it probably only requires sitting at a different table every once in a while.